Things About Holiday Travels

- EVERYONE needs to be in your lane.
- THE WHOLE WORLD is going to the same place
- people are lemmings in motorized weapons
- heavy rain is worse than snow
- Helicopters should be standard issue to those of us stupid enough to have more than one child
- alternate routes are from the devil
- red lights ARE the devil
- children do not help
- music does not help
- no amount of terrible, high-calorie junk food helps
- caffeine doesn't help
- nothing helps
- heavy traffic invokes nervous flatulence in large dogs
- and children


BUT

On The Flip Side

- there is family
- and good food
- and wine (with plenty of justification)
- and no driving for 2.5 days, at least
- nobody died (this time)
- all the other drivers are just trying to get to their families too. (which are mysteriously located next door to yours)
- there is pie
- and your baby brother
- and many wiener dogs

So, it's worth it.



Comments