Things Lately

It's been a rough couple of months. I feel like I keep saying that over and over and the months get rougher rather than better. The sun is out now so that helps - it almost looks like we might have a spring after all, now that it's summer.

A few weeks ago I said goodbye to one of my all-time besties, my old hounder Truck. Truckles. Trucker. Truckladite. Even now, sitting in a conference room on the last few minutes of a lunch break at some sort of fire training, listening to my classmates talk about sales on RVs, I find myself choking back tears. Even now it's still too soon to talk about it. Maybe it always will be.

Since then it has been a marathon of work hours, training hours, writing deadlines, softball games, track meets, doctor appointments, surgeries, conference calls, multi-hour drives, etc, etc, etc, and never less than two of those at once, all day, every day.

And then there was the day that my romantic entanglement became disentangled. One day I have a boyfriend and Big Plans, and the next day I am single and not a plan on the horizon. I swing wildly back and forth between feeling the most lost I have ever felt and feeling wide open to new adventures, what ever they may be. Something big is coming. Something good is coming. Life is never what you expect.

In all of that, I am still learning. Or maybe I am learning more. I am learning that it's ok to not be ok. I am discovering that no matter how important and necessary you feel a person is in your life, the power they have is really your choice. I am finding out that absolutely NOTHING is so important that it should keep you from being true to yourself, proud of the path you've carved and honest to the people around you.

I am learning that I have a herd of badass kids that are more awesome than even I know, and I am truly grateful. I am learning that you can't underestimate the power of the love of Good People. And there are lots of Good People.

Things About Good People

I am not a Luke Bryan fan. Ima just get that out there right off the bat. But he's got this new song out and with some of the stuff that's been happening in my life lately, it fits the bill, and I can't avoid it.

I started a blog post about the things in my life that have been hard lately. I said goodbye to my old hound Trucker a few weeks ago. My kids are all growing up and facing Real Life struggles that I can't (and shouldn't) help bail them out of. My little pod of security that is my kids and dogs and small town life is unraveling in every direction, and the transition is hard. My life plays a little bit like a country song right now. But the bigger thing than all of that is the GOOD. The AMAZING things that have been happening. HUGE things and teeny things, but AWESOME things.

Because most people are good.

Some friends came and mowed my lawn, raking up piles of thick, wet grass with their bare hands after I asked just to borrow their lawnmower. They refused to let me help. Then a few days later, they showed up and dropped off a brand new lawnmower on my front porch. Not because I deserve it. Not because they're looking for credit... because they're good, kind people with big hearts in the middle of their own adversity. They're the kind of people I want to be.

Somebody else donated enough money to sponsor FIVE local Veterans to participate in the Catch 22 Memorial Day Shootout. I can't even tell you how big that is in my heart. For every business that I have marched in to, and every email I have sent, and phone call I have made (and I HATE talking on the phone) - this one donation made every step worth it. Because the donor (who asked to remain anonymous) is Good People. Like all of the local businesses who pitched in, big and small, to help out local vets. Good People.

I wrote about my friend awhile back, and her lifetime love that was slowly slipping away from her. An optimistic note from her and the love she has for him, in the hardest of hard times, give me faith that it's out there. Deep and abiding love. She's Good People.

When I am having a hard day, my kids, the ones I never give enough credit to, rally around me like my own little Secret Service Detail. Somehow even I raised some Good People. They're amazing.

I don't even have enough thank yous for all these Good People. But I love you all.

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